don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
