if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize