There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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