I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
