Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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