i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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