I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
