I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
