Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
