I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Randomize