OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize