i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Dick very happy bro
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize