so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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