i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
