Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
