Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
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