i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
