Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize