the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Randomize
