i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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