Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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