rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
