Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
