i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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