I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
