he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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