Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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