Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
