Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
