i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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