she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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