Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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