this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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