Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
