The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
