she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
