What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I stole a fireplace last night.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
