then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
