he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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