all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
