I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
