Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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