I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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