Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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