I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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