yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I need a beard to bite.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
