So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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