i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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