best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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