Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
